Thursday, July 2, 2009

Surgery and breastfeeding

I had surgery yesterday. I thought I had hemorrhoids during the pregnancy and after. I guess I didn't. It got so bad last week that I went to the ER in the middle of the night. I was told it was hemorrhoids and to see a surgeon. Last Friday I saw the surgeon, just to learn it wasn't hemorrhoids, but rather anal fissures. So yesterday I had my sphincter muscle repaired and fissures removed. It hurts to sit and well it's just not fun.

Breastfeeding has never been great, but I've had some rewarding times. Times that I felt like I was really making progress and doing an awesome job. Before surgery Ellie began falling asleep while I breastfed her. Ugh, very hard on me, to make sure she gets what she needed. But, after the surgery, she had to have bottles for 24hrs. Now today was HORRIBLE for us. She refused every time but 2. And those 2 times she'll take it as long as there is a nice heavy stream, but once she has to work a little she freaks out. I'm so ready to throw my arms up and say forget it. But, on the flip side, I'm really wanting to fight to keep it going. I don't have a pump, we were renting one and I let it go back in June. I think I'm loosing supply, but I also know that I can still increase if I buy a pump (low on money these days), and PUMP, PUMP, PUMP. There is also a bottle that I saw at babies r us that resembles the breast, maybe if I use that, and pump, then maybe I can get her back on the breast. I dunno. I miss my time w/ my precious baby. :-(


Morgan said...

Girl, I had the same thing!! I thought it was hemorrhoids too and I was so embarassed to go to the doctor but I couldn't even take it anymore! Turns out it was an anal tear (fissure) and it hurt like a Mo-Fuc! I feel for you girl!! Glad to hear from you though, hope things get better!

The Dorns said...

Breastfeeding is so tough.You are doing a great thing just why does it have to be so tough. I wouldnt buy the Adiri bottle I have used it and my friends have also and nododies baby took to it. I would suggest buying preemie nipples for the bottles you already own. The main idea is that she drinks it slowly and not gulps it down. I would also suggest buying the Medela Harmony itsabout 35 bucks or any other manual expression pump. Yes it takes longer but its cheap and would empty the breast. The more you empty it the more milk you produce if you are unabke to express it your supply will decrease so pumping would be best. You may also want to see if you have a program that would help you get a breast pump ask your pediatrician if they heard of one. In California the program is called WIC.